Do you like your work? Have lots of hobbies? Think your friends are the best ever? If you’re looking for a date, well, that’s really a shame.
See, some researchers went out and studied how men and women perceived each other on first sight, specifically what made the other sexually attractive. It turns out that if you’re a happy guy who smiles a lot, women won’t be as interested in you as they would be if you swaggered around like you owned the place or brooded like John Cusack in pretty much every movie he’s ever made.
The study found that women were least attracted to smiling, happy men, preferring those who looked proud and powerful or moody and ashamed. In contrast, male participants were most sexually attracted to women who looked happy, and least attracted to women who appeared proud and confident.
… past research has associated smiling with a lack of dominance, which is consistent with traditional gender norms of the “submissive and vulnerable” woman, but inconsistent with “strong, silent” man, the researchers say. “Previous research has also suggested that happiness is a particularly feminine-appearing expression.”
Thus the suggestion to “get in touch with your feminine side.”
Part of me thinks I knew all this in high school. Another part of me is really glad I’m not dating anymore. But the biggest part of me thinks this is a study about superficial impressions (something the researchers sort of point out in academic language) that don’t really count for very much after you open your mouth. Assuming you say the right thing, of course.
I have no suggestions to offer here. It seemed worth sharing, though, if only to suggest that if you’re brooding at home after a bad day of work, you may want to go brood at Starbucks or something instead.